My Inspiration

Jane was a very unselfish person, she always put others first.
At one stage earlier in the year I suggested to Jane that I cut back on some of my other commitments so I could spend more time with her, I told her I would cut back on some of my weekend Table Tennis competititions.
She would not let me and her solution was to come along and support me, remember her coming along to watch me play at Swindon for my Veterans National League team. She was quite nervous the night before and really worried she would put me off. Actually as it turned out I think she inspired me and I won all 10 of my matches that weekend helping my team to promotion. She never saw me lose.

Feeling Low

Today I've been feeling down can't get Jane's lovely sweet smile out of my mind things just don't seem real. This morning I ordered my flowers for her funeral and when it came to writing the message I had a bit of an emotional moment.
I'm really missing her which may seem strange because the distance between our homes meant we only met up once a month. However every morning when I turned on my phone would they be a nice message or when I checked emails there would be some joke, we talked on the phone or IM, we just communicated all the time.
To be honest at present I'm so non motivated to do anything, I'm eating too much and just feeling sorry for myself. What dissapoints me is Jane wouldn't want me like this she wanted me to stay strong but its not easy. I really loved her, maybe I can start to move on after the funeral next Wednesday but I'll never forget her.

An Angel

Jane was a fantastic person to know, she was so easy to get on with and always put others first. She also loved animals and one day she really loved was a visit to the Zoo on our last holiday.
When we first found out the devastating news about how ill she was, her first reaction was to think of me, she said she would understand if I walked away from our relationship, she didn't want me to go through a hard time.
No way was I gonna do that and deep down I'm sure she was pleased with the time I spent at her hospital bedside, I really loved her and still do, I will never forget her.

Jane's Music

One thing that Jane & myself had in common was a love of music although our tastes did vary, not saying we disliked each others stuff we both respected each others tastes. Jane was more into voice and loved Elvis, The Drifters, Billy Ocean, Billy Joel, to mention a few. Personally I'm more into instruments especially guitar love classic rock & Blues.

Anyway my todays song is one that Jane wanted playing at her funeral, I now cry when I hear it :-

Goodbye my little Cheesecake

Although I'm obviously still heartbroken over what has happend, I'm trying to think of all the good times I had with Jane over the last 15 months. I remember once telling Jane I give everyone I like a nickname, of course straight away she asked what hers was, I told her "Cheesecake" not just a plain one but "Stawberry Cheesecake".
She asked why on earth I called her that, the answer was easy just told her I found her irresistable just like I do Strawberry Cheesecake. She liked then liked the name and it stuck.
She always had a fun sense of humour and when I visited her in hospital while she was very ill she joked she'd now have to be my "Lemon Cheesecake" due to the colour her skin had gone from the poison in her system.

Here is my todays song for Jane RIP my darling

WHY ?

First I'd like to thank all the many friends that knew about what has happend for their emails of sympathy and their support following the tragic death of my my girlfriend, it was really appreciated.

I am still devastated and can't believe how quick it all happend and the only question I can come up with is "Why ?".


I know none of you knew Jane but she was a lovely person would do anything for anyone, she loved people and animals, she always put others first. I really thought I'd hit the jackpot finding her and nothing can take away the memory of these last 15 months since we first met.


I can't believe only a few weeks ago we were having a great time on holiday in Chicago and not a clue she was ill.



Still don't know when the funeral is should maybe find out tomorrow, I feel it will be my last chance to say goodbye. Don't think my life will ever be the same, she changed me for the better.

Loved her to bits.

Gonna post a song per day for Jane until the funeral :-

Sorry

Sorry I haven't been around anyones blogs, things are not good with a friend seriously ill and I'm spending much of time away from home visiting and offering my support.

Cadillac Records - At Last

One film currently out I'd like to see is "Cadillac records" which is about Chess records in Chicago.
I see Beyonce plays the part of Etta James and its causing some argument between music fans to who does the best version of the classic love song "At Last". Must admit I would go for Etta as this song belongs to her but at the same time I'm impressed with Beyonces version.
Thing is searching the internet this song has been performed by some superb female singers so I ask you the question of which version you prefer :-

Etta James :-


Beyonce :-


Cyndi Lauper :-


Christina Anguilera :-


Eva Cassidy :-


Celine Dion :-


For the record I'm going for :-
1. Etta
2. Celine
3. Eva
4. Beyonce
5. Christina
6. Cyndi

Its very difficult and you could put them in any order.

Holiday Photo's

As promised in the previous post about my Chicago trip with Jane I've sorted my holiday pics for anyone to look at.

Use this Link :-
http://www.flickr.com/photos/8308363@N02/sets/72157621334897716/detail/

Hope you enjoy.

Fun, Food & Fights

Well I'm now back from my Chicago trip and have plenty to report. As you know I've been a few times in the past but for Jane it was her first visit to the windy City (her first to the US actually). Of course before we set off I had warned Jane about how hot it would be at this time of year and she definately wouldn't need our waterproof clothes. However in practice this wasn't the case tempretures in general were 15 degrees lower than normal and we had some quite drizzly days (usually each time we went to the festival), so much for global warming.

Not going to report things in any particular order but thought I'd better start with one of the lowlights (which was supposed to be an highlight). On the evening of July 3rd we made our way to Grant Park to watch the the Independance Firework display. When we arrived the crowds were massive (estimates between one & two million), we tried to get near Buckingham Fountain but it was too packed so we settled for a spot set back.
Shortly before there was a loud bang and a rumour spread it was a gun shot (actually a fire cracker I think) anyway a section of the crowd panicked and stampeded. I grapped Jane and we just stood still as it calmed down. Now we noticed a lot of gangs of youths milling around all dressed in gang like uniforms and the atmosphere started to feel a little tense. Something kicked off creating a bigger stampede in the crowd, Jane turned to run but I grabbed her reckoning it was safer to stand as people were falling and getting trampled (felt a bit like a redcoat at Rorkes Drift though).
Again things calmed for awhile then the Fireworks started, however again trouble started, appeared to be local gang rivalries to me and again we stood our ground. One chap in his fifties fell into us and we helped him (his wife later thanked us). Gangs were all over the place and one large group started to gather right in front of us, two old ladies sat in front of us packed up and suggested it would be a good idea to move, we took the advice and moved back to Michegan Ave to watch the end of the fireworks.
I saw kids crying, elderly people scared and many people leaving before the end, its a shame young thugs spoil what should have been a great occasion, hope a few got arrested.

Following on from that we found the rest of the people we came across really nice & friendly but what else did we do :-
We visited the "Taste of Chicago" festival a few times but always seemed to hit the worst of the weather. Although it was fun I thought the standard of the music wasn't as great as on my previous visits although we enjoyed "Broadway in Chicago" on the main stage. Others we liked included "Uncle Bob & the Bluzers" on the Best Buy stage & "Rob Stone & the C notes" on the Taste stage. We were looking forward to the Tribute Band day as acts playing CSNY, Luthor Vandross, Eagles, Rolling Stones & U2 were playing but I'm afraid the rain beat us.

We also went up Sears Tower after queing for a long time, they have some new features which includes a Glass Floor you can walk out on and look straight down from the 103rd floor. Also visited Union Station and got a photo of the stairs from the pram scene in "The Untouchables".

We visited a couple of museums "The Chicago History Museum" which I haven't been before was interesting but not really value for money, it was quite small and not enough things to look at. The museum of Science and Industry is just the opposite you need a full day, I've been before but there was quite a bit of new stuf, its a fun day out with plenty for us big kids to play on. Ok I'll admit it Jane beat me on a computorised game but I think it was faulty, lol.

We also did the Architecture River boat trip after a walk down the shops of Michegan Ave (Magnificent Mile) on our first day.

Another first for me was a visit to Garfield Conservetory which was nice and Cactus will be pleased to know they had a lovely section dedicated to her favorite plants. Yes and I did take some photos of them.

We spent another day at Lincoln Park Zoo which is really good (and free), saw numerous animals and got some good pics reckon the highlights was the monkey house, could watch them for hours.

We visited Navy Pier and took a Cruise on Lake Michegan on the "Odessey", thought we were going on the "Spirit of Chicago" but they cocked up our booking, didn't complain cos I reckon we ended up with a better deal than we paid for. They welcomed us on with Champagne then we had a lovely meal while cruising for two hours and taking in some fantastic city views.

The hotel we stayed at was "The Ambassador East" which as a lot of history many of the stars of the big screen stayed there and used its bar the Pump Room. Photos of stars sat in the bar were all ove the place, recognised a few but a lot were before my time. Couldn't understand why the didn't want our picture, lol.

We visited a number of bars & Clubs on a night and saw some really good music, saw Shirley Johnson in Blue Chicago and I got her new album which she signed, its currently top of the US Blues charts.
Also visited "The Green Mill" cocktail lounge which takes you back to the Prohibition era, apparently Al Capone was a regular. When we was there Alan Gresiks Swing orchaestra was performing, they were really good and the place was packed to the rafters.
One night we visited Kingston Mines the famous blues Club, the had two acts on Charlie Love & Linsey Alexander, both were good but different. Charlie is an out & out entertainer playing a range of music styles while Linsey is very guitar orientated, started his set with a version of Hendrix "Little Wing".
We also visited a couple of Piano Bars "Jilly's" on Rush street & the "Redhead" were we spent the night supping cocktails.
On our last night we ate at Andy's Jazz Club, we got the tail end of a Jazz Orchaestra and they were really good but the main act was "Yoko Noge's Jazz me Blues Band" they were awesome entertainment.

As for food everwhere we ate was fantastic but the portions were enough to feed a family of four, at least it kept me away from puddings I was always too full. Can't remember all the places but two spring to mind "Weber Grill & Tavern on Rush". We also ate one night in a place in the Lincoln Park district near the Biograph Theatre and they have just recently filmed the new gangster movie "Public Enemies" about Dillinger (who was shot at he Biograph). Johnny Depp is playing the lead role and he had been eating in the same place we went, they had a big photo on the wall of Depp and the other actors sat in the bar in their gangster clothing.

I'll post my photos soon as I've sorted them for those interested.